Mental recovery is something that many people are looking for, especially how to bounce back after experiencing something bad. Today, we’re going to try to find ways to deal with this with Lucy Hone.
In the heart of Christchurch, at a TEDx event, resilience expert Lucy Hone took the stage to share a powerful message. She had experienced a tragedy no parent should have to go through – the loss of her beloved daughter Abby in a car accident. This traumatic experience, combined with her extensive research, has shaped her into a beacon of hope and light for others. She shares three key strategies for building resilience, combining scientific research with her personal journey.
Lucy began by inviting the audience to stand if they had ever faced adversity. Almost everyone in the room stood, a powerful reminder that adversity is an experience everyone must experience. She then recounted her education and work at the University of Pennsylvania, and her role in training American soldiers in mental toughness. But nothing prepared her for the ultimate test: losing Abby.
Strategy 1: Accept the hardship
“Life is hard, but embracing hardship is the first step to building true resilience.”
“Life is hard,” Lucy says bluntly. “To have psychological resilience, we need to accept that adversity is a part of life.” This acceptance helps prevent us from feeling unfairly treated when faced with hardship. It shifts our thinking from asking, “Why me?” to understanding that hardship is an experience that everyone experiences.
Strategy Two: Focus on the Positive
“When you focus on the positive, even in the darkest of times, you will find the light that helps you move forward.”
In her darkest moments, Lucy discovered the power of optimism. “Resilient people focus on what they can change and accept what they can’t,” she says. This approach, known as benefit-finding, helped her cope with her grief. By focusing on the good, even in the midst of grief, she found gratitude that helped her move forward. “I had to find something to be grateful for in order to move forward,” she admits.
Strategy Three: Self-Assessment
“Always asking yourself, ‘Is what I’m doing helping or hurting me?’ is the key to making the right decisions.”
The third strategy is simple yet powerful: Always ask yourself, “Is what I’m doing helping or hurting me?” This question has become Lucy’s compass. “It gives you control over your decisions, helping you steer toward actions that heal rather than hurt,” she explains. The practice doesn’t require any special skills, just the willingness to stop and consider.
Conclusion
As an author, listening to and writing about Lucy Hone not only taught me her remarkable story, but also opened my eyes to the need to develop a new perspective on how to cope with life’s difficulties and the need for mental resilience. I learned that:
- Acceptance and Coping : Accepting that hardships are a part of life allows us to face them calmly and mindfully.
- Look for the positive : In every situation, even in times of sadness, if we look for the positive and what we are grateful for, it will give us the strength and energy to move forward.
- Evaluation and Decision Making : Asking yourself, “Is what I am doing helping or hurting me?” is a powerful tool for guiding our lives in a positive direction.
Mental resilience is not easy. It requires commitment, determination, and practice. But the result is lasting mental strength that allows us to face challenges with more confidence and enjoy our daily lives more.
“Resilience is not a trait you are born with, but a skill you can develop with intention and practice.”
I hope Lucy Hone’s story and the lessons she shares inspire everyone who reads this article. No matter what hardships you face in life, remember that you can bounce back and grow stronger. Accepting suffering, focusing on the positive, and evaluating yourself are the keys to building mental resilience.
“Accepting what we cannot change and focusing on what we can change is the key to inner peace and strength.”
As the author, I send my encouragement to all those facing challenges and invite you to try implementing these strategies into your daily life so that you can overcome the difficulties and find happiness and success every day.
The three secrets of resilient people | Lucy Hone | TEDxChristchurchurch
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