Quitting because of the boss has become the number one reason why many employees are forced to change jobs. Even if the job is good and the coworkers are good, if the boss is not good, they cannot decide to stay.
As an example from a true story and real situation that comes from a story told by a fan page.
In a workplace, the incident occurred on a Monday morning.
The boss was pointing at and scolding one of his subordinates in a very angry mood.
“You are really sloppy. You do sloppy work. You do simple work, but you still make mistakes.”
“I’ve been working for many years. Is this all you can do?”
“So you don’t understand what I explained earlier? If you don’t understand, why didn’t you ask?”
“I think if this is all you can do, it’s time for you to reconsider whether you should continue working here or not.”
Why is my boss never satisfied with the work I do?
Am muttered to herself after just getting a hard time from her boss.
“It seems like the boss really doesn’t like us.”
“No matter what I do, it’s always wrong. No matter what I do, it’s never right.”
“No matter what I send, you always find mistakes to criticize me and criticize me.”
And “he often criticizes us in front of other people, which makes us lose our confidence.”
For example, regarding the most recent meeting, “they criticized us in front of other departments, saying that we did not prepare all the information, that we did not make good slides, and that we did not provide clear information.”
“Every day I feel worse, more stressed and unhappy working with a boss like this.”
“The boss is so biased against us. No matter how hard we work or how nice we are to him, it’s useless.”
Am continued to talk to herself, “Actually, I am also very talented and capable. I have worked in many places and everyone admires me.”
“But why does the boss only want to take action against me? My coworkers never think of helping me. They only think of making things worse.”
“What did I do wrong? The work I did wasn’t that bad. How can you accuse me like that?”
“Then why should I have to endure such a bad, prejudiced boss?”
“Enough with the shitty boss. Enough with the shitty coworkers.”
Three years here, it must be time to make a decision…..
A week later, Am decided to immediately submit her resignation.
After she officially submitted her resignation letter, Am announced to the department, “You can continue working here. A job with no future, a boss with no future, and a company with no future.”
“Now I have a new job with a new, bigger and better company waiting for someone as good as me to work for them,” Am said with glee.
Four months later with a new company
Am walked out of the boss’s room with an irritated expression and mood.
“My boss is so stupid. How many times has this happened? I have to nag and follow up on this small task. It’s so annoying.”
“You’re always looking for faults in us. Don’t you trust each other at all? You’re checking up on everything, every job.”
“He’s so picky and complains a lot. I can’t stand him anymore. I’m not happy if I stay here.”
“There are many big companies that want us. If we stay here, we will just waste our time with these terrible people.”
And then, Am decided to resign from her latest company after working for just over four months.
What do you think will happen to Am’s life next?
Looking for a new job? Because I quit because of my boss.
Am may be lucky and find a new job easily because she is only in her early 30s and has worked for many famous companies.
But is there a chance that you will encounter the same bad boss again?
It is possible, but before blaming others, I should also look back at myself.
Because every problem that happened to me was the result of something or many things that I had caused or done.
No boss would want to find fault with or find fault with a subordinate who is truly capable, capable, and performs excellently.
There must be something, such as a mistake, a defect, or something else that makes the boss see that Am’s work should not be allowed to go through so easily or that Am should not be allowed to work without being inspected.
I believe that many people have experienced similar situations.
Should I resign? Is resigning because of my boss the solution to this problem?
As for resigning to find a new job, it might be possible for some people.
But many people may not be able to do this because their choices may not be many or they have many limitations that prevent them from finding a new job or changing jobs, such as age limitations, experience limitations, positions, salary bases, benefits, or other issues.
Therefore, resigning is not always a good option to end the problem.
Because even if you resign, there is no guarantee that you will not encounter this problem again in your new job.
It’s like Am who decided to resign. But before long, she had to face the same old problems again.
The beginning of this problem (Am’s example) is caused by Am deceiving herself (in English, it is called Self-Deception).
Self-deception is when we try to deny that we have a problem by distorting everything around us and trying to find reasons to support ourselves or whatever else is the problem or blaming other things instead.
In this case, I resigned because of my boss. I am blaming my boss for being the problem.
“Our mindset is causing us problems.”
We think too much of ourselves, to the point where we don’t value others, and worse, we view others (or everyone) as our enemy.
The result is that we betray ourselves (Self Betrayal) by creating self-righteousness.
How do we betray ourselves?
For example, in Am’s case, her boss criticized her for her poor performance. Instead of trying to accept it and make corrections or improvements, Am
Am did the opposite, finding other reasons to support herself to cover up her own shortcomings, such as shifting the blame for her boss’s view of Am’s badness onto herself and her coworkers instead.
Because Am has this kind of mindset, in the book Outward Mindset: Seeing Beyond Ourselves , it says that people who have Am’s attitude are people with an Inward Mindset , which means they think very positively of themselves. And because of being this kind of person, they are not happy and have to keep encountering the same problems.
If you want to escape the cycle of Inward Mindset, you have to do the opposite, which is to think with Outward Mindset , which means “stop favoring yourself and don’t think about changing the person in front of you, change yourself.”
Outward Mindset changes our perspective because it sees others as valuable and no less important than ourselves. For example, when our boss criticizes us, it is because he wants our work to be good (look at the intention as well, not just the action).
But his communication method may not be to our liking, but his intention is to wish us well. If we look at it with an Inward Mindset, everything will look bad, not just with our boss or colleagues. The worst person is ourselves.
We cannot succeed if we cannot work with others or get others to work with us.
Outward Mindset is therefore important, especially for people in this era, where most people are lacking happiness in their lives and work.
We can easily have a Work Life Balance by starting simply by having an Outward Mindset.
For more articles about Outward Mindset, please visit:
Employees’ Inward Mindset That May Cause Companies to Close Down
Source:
https://arbingerinstitute.com/Landing/TheOutwardMindset.htmlutwardMindset.htmlardMindset.html
