Introverts – The hidden power of a group of people who are quite private. They seem to be a group of people who have difficulty working with others. However, this group of people also has many abilities and advantages. If we understand them, working together is not difficult.
The Power of Introverts When I saw the title of this topic in TED2012, I couldn’t help but wonder if there was a little conflict in my mind about the title. Because power, motivation, or enthusiasm should be the opposite of being an introvert. But because most people think this way, people who are introverted and don’t like to socialize are seen as strange and uncooperative, even though this personality trait is not anyone’s fault.
Susan Cain shared her story of introversion in a TED2012 talk titled The Power of Introverts. I’m sure after listening to it, the conflict we had with the title may have disappeared immediately. Introverts are really powerful.
“In my family, reading was the main activity. It may sound antisocial to you, but it was a different kind of socialization for us.”
Susan grew up in a family of readers. Her parents loved to read, it was almost like it was passed down through her genes because she loved to read too. Her grandfather loved to read too. His grandfather’s house was her favorite place because there were tables and chairs to sit on and put things on, but every piece of furniture was also used to put books in.
“I don’t understand why we have to be so naughty.”
When she was a child, her family sent her to summer camp where they had to repeat the word “naughty” over and over as if it were some kind of ritual. The first time she picked up a book, a friend asked her, “Why do you seem so composed?” It sounded good, right? But to everyone else, it wasn’t. This sentence made her stand out from her peers simply because she liked different activities. But then a teacher came up to her and told her to try to be more social, because that was the whole point of summer camp.
“I chose to do the opposite of what I wanted to do to prove myself. Yes, I did it to myself.”
She says she started lying to herself, denying the benefits of being an introvert, when in fact many introverts are successful just the way they are. She chose to work in a prestigious firm instead of becoming a writer like she wanted to be. She chose to go to crowded bars instead of quiet restaurants with a few close friends. All of the choices she made were not who she was.
“Being an introvert is different from being shy.”
We must first understand that being shy is a fear of social judgment, fear of the thoughts of people who focus on us and criticize us, thinking in various ways. Introversion is a response to stimulation. People who do not like to be introverted and like to socialize will like an environment that is stimulated by stimuli around them, so they can work well. However, introverts like to work in a quiet place, a place that makes them feel comfortable, which will allow them to reach their full potential.
“Groupthink bias”
Our second home, as people like to say, such as schools, universities, educational institutions where all children are sent to study, such places are not designed for introverts at all. Be it desks, chairs, or even some teachers. Most teachers prefer outgoing, sociable children and judge this type of behavior as the right behavior. These children are praised, while introverts are seen as oddballs. Sometimes these people are called in for a chat after school to help them socialize more, even though research has shown that introverts actually perform better academically than non-introverts.
“Introverts always miss out on leadership positions.”
These events do not only happen in schools, but also in our offices or workplaces. Leadership positions tend to be filled by people who are not introverted but are outspoken, even though they are often so excited about putting their own ideas out there that they forget to listen to others’ ideas. Introverts tend to be more cautious and do not take risks, which is probably what businesses need more in the present day.
“No one is extremely introverted and no one is extremely open.”
Carl Jung, a psychologist, said that in today’s society, no one can be an extreme introvert, and no one can be an extreme extrovert either. If so, they must be in a mental hospital somewhere. The fact that we have these two types of people clearly means that we are like the yin and yang of the world, helping each other to fill what each person lacks. Therefore, before we can fill someone up, we must understand what they lack and what they need. Otherwise, the filling will become too much.
“No hardship, no discovery.”
This may not seem like a religious story, but if we compare it to religion, Moses, Jesus, Buddha, Muhammad, they were all successful explorers. But when we look at the methods, they all chose to isolate themselves, face hardships, and then come back with a widely accepted philosophy of life, which people today call “religion.”
“We live together in society by imitating our thoughts and instincts.”
Most people in society tend to pick out someone who is successful in a way they like and then follow him without realizing it. For example, if we want to be a good talker, a good talker like someone we admire, we start reading the same books, going to the same places as him, starting to eat the same as him, sleeping the same way, because we hope that we will discover the same special abilities as him. Unfortunately, these things will prevent us from discovering the special things that we have by ourselves, because we will be following in other people’s footsteps, and our thoughts will be distorted without us realizing it.
“Instead of working with people we’ve known since birth, we tend to prove ourselves by working with strangers.”
Our world is changing every day. In the past, people admired those who acted more than those who pondered. People admired those who were intrinsic, morality, character, and good conduct. Everyone was action-oriented. But in the 20th century, we entered a new culture that praised talking, socializing, and seeking success. This change has forced people in society to adapt in order to be praised as well.
“My introversion makes me feel like I’m balancing on a rock.”
On days when life changes, Susan’s introversion makes her feel like she’s taking on a risky task. Sometimes, she feels like she could collapse at any moment. For example, an introvert like her has spent years practicing just how to speak in public where all eyes are on her.
Susan explains that this is what being an introvert looks like, so to better understand her, she suggests three things she wants everyone to do to understand not just your own introversion, but someone around you who may be feeling uncomfortable with feeling isolated right now.
1. Stop the teamwork madness.
In schools and universities, teachers often give students a lot of group work. Even in companies, many tasks require everyone to work together. Although sharing ideas is good for everyone, we still need freedom in our work and we need to teach everyone to work by themselves, which means the whole work, not just a part of it.
2. Go to difficult places like the Buddha.
This does not mean that we should walk into the forest alone without talking to anyone, but rather, we should go into our own minds more often and explore our inner thoughts more often.
3. Look at the things in your bag and think about why you are carrying them.
For those who are not introverts, there are probably many convenient items in your bag that show who you are. Let’s use them to express who we are with the greatest happiness. For those who are introverts, let’s sometimes dare to open our bags and show others what we are carrying.
“No matter who you are, the world needs you, and the world needs what you have.”
Conclusion
Whether you are an extrovert or an introvert, you are all in this world. Acceptance is an important part of social cohesion. If you want others to accept you, you must first accept yourself, and then you must accept others as well.
Because not everyone in the world is born the same, everyone is different in their own way. This is the charm that makes everyone in the world complement each other.
“I wish you all the best in your journey and have the courage to start speaking out softly.”
The power of introverts | Susan Cain
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