How much is our suffering or our disappointment worth? I believe that many people have never thought about or never valued or estimated the value of these two things before.
In the workplace, there are many problems, but if we divide them into categories, they can’t be any different from 3 issues: problems with your boss or supervisor, problems with your coworkers, and problems with yourself. For example:
- I’m having problems with my coworkers. We have a disagreement because of our differences of opinion. This has caused them to hate me and often make sarcastic remarks about me. Now I feel very uncomfortable. I haven’t been able to eat or sleep for a week. This has made me not want to go to work because I don’t want to face them. What should I do?
- I am very stressed. My boss is not happy with me. I don’t know why. It’s been over a month that I’ve been given only paperwork. My boss doesn’t give me any new projects. He even gave the projects I’m working on to my friends. If things go on like this, I’m not going to make it here, right?
- I have started my new job for two weeks now, but I feel a lot of pressure. The pressure comes from my coworkers. They are not friendly at all. They answer questions with one word and let me do things incorrectly. I am afraid that my boss will think that I am incompetent and will not pass the probation period. Should I look for a new job?
- I resigned from my old job and started working at my new one for almost a month. But I feel that I made the wrong decision to resign. The new place that I thought was good, it wasn’t as good as I thought. So I thought about going back to work at my old place. But one part of me is afraid that my old boss won’t accept me. Another part of me is afraid that if I go back, what will my old coworkers think? Because the reason I resigned was because I had problems with my coworkers. This week, I’ve been so confused. I don’t know what to do. What should I do?
- I am very bored with my job. I am bored with the working atmosphere here. I have been bored for many years. I really want to change jobs, but I am afraid because I am getting older. If I get a new job, I am afraid that I will not be able to adapt. If I cannot survive, I am afraid that I will lose my job. It will be even harder to find a new job. What should I do?
This is just an example of what happens in the workplace, and I believe that many people have certainly felt this way before.
What are the consequences of these problems?
When a problem occurs, what follows are emotions, such as fear, anxiety, stress, or overthinking. But what doesn’t happen is thinking of ways to solve the problem, or even better, solving these problems altogether.
Another consequence is that overthinking accumulates more and more. You start to accumulate more and more anxiety, fear, and stress for yourself, from minutes to hours, days, months, and years, or for some people, it may last longer.
“Those who are weak and easily shaken may succumb to their emotions.”
It is very easy for our feelings to come before our reason because we are overwhelmed by our emotions and our own sensitivities, which prevents us from finding a way out or making any decisions. When we are in a situation where we cannot make a decision, it causes suffering, suffering because we are uncomfortable with the things we cannot choose.
“Because time does not solve every problem. Our decisions are the ones that truly solve the problem.”
Or in some cases, there is a feeling of incoherence, unable to make decisions by oneself, having to constantly ask for advice from others. When others give advice, it is not to one’s liking, so one goes back to thinking too much until not making any decisions, and hoping that time will help solve the problem. It turns out that the problem becomes even bigger than before. This is another cause that comes from not making decisions quickly or not finding a way to solve the problem quickly.
Our suffering, our disappointment, actually has its value.
Because every problem or thing that makes us suffer has its own value. The value of problems and suffering in monetary terms can be measured, such as:
If we record the time we think too much or are distressed, no matter what it is at work or in life, I believe that in total it will not be less than 1 hour per day.
For example, you can see from the time we complain about work, tell our friends about it, or when we are sad, disappointed, and can’t work. Altogether, it will definitely take hours. It might even exceed it because we keep thinking about it after work.
If we think too much about work-related matters every day, whether it’s about our boss or our coworkers, for an hour a day, that would be 30 hours a month.
Suppose that we earn 30,000 baht per month. The value of time spent thinking is 5,625 baht (based on working 8 hours per day, working 5 days per week) or 30 hours of wasted time per month.
30 hours, you can use this time to do many good things, you can use it to rest or if you use it to earn extra income, you will get a lot of money, better than sitting around thinking too much about suffering at work.
And if we keep thinking about things at work for a year, how much will it be?
The value of health problems and suffering If we use the same example, stressed every day, thinking too much every day, for an hour a day, what will our lives be like?
Keeping problems and suffering with you for a long time is like a ticking time bomb. It makes your mental health worse and your physical health worse too.
“Hard work never killed anyone (it’s a bit hard, but when you rest, you’ll recover), but accumulated stress from work can easily kill people.”
It makes it easy to suddenly get lucky and get a serious disease like cancer (stress is the main food of cancer). Plus, how much more will the medical expenses be? Some people easily go bankrupt because of stress, illness, and serious disease.
Or some people may be worse, they may harm themselves or commit suicide, and may leave a burden for others. So why do we add stress and suffering to our brains and minds?
Therefore, being stressed, suffering, and complaining will not be beneficial and will not lead to any solution.
“If you have a problem, solve it. Don’t run away from it.”
Problems of quarrels can always occur in work. If we can reduce our stubbornness, talk things out, apologize, the problem will end or be reduced. It is better than being at odds with each other just because of a small matter.
In terms of not understanding your coworkers or boss, instead of holding in bad feelings, try to open up and talk to them nicely with reason. No matter what they say, you will find out. It is better than holding in problems and suffering.
Some people say that we want to end the problem, but the other party doesn’t. But this is still better. At least we have already gotten through it and don’t have to keep thinking about those problems. Let the other party think about it instead.
In terms of fear, change is normal. If we fear something very much, we must find ways to prepare for it. For example, if we fear losing our job, we must develop ourselves or find additional income to prepare for it.
As for any issues or problems that have not yet occurred, we should not be too quick to make a big deal out of it, because they may not happen. If we think about them in advance, it will become suffering from issues that have not yet occurred, or in other words, suffering in advance.
As for problems and suffering, it is something that we all have to face. It is just a matter of how we manage it, how we can limit it from spreading and taking over our hearts.
This depends on each person’s ability to let it spread or how quickly they can let it pass.
At this point, I would like to ask us again, how much are our problems and suffering worth right now? And is it worth keeping them?
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Every decision made by emotion can lead to a life of turmoil.
